next steps

so it's now Thursday. it's been 4 days since i saw her (for the first time in 2 months). she is, of course, on my mind fairly constantly.

on tuesday night she sent through on whatsapp a pic of her in her new glasses. because she didn't wear them on sunday (she did promise to send me a pic as she hadn't worn them).

let me reiterate, she sent me a pic of her in glasses. and i was overwhelmed. she. is. so. so. so. beautiful.

which makes it so much harder not to be with her, or to be seeing her a lot.

i told her simply 'wow, just wow. you are so beautiful'. she thanked me for the compliment. it seemed light and fun.

i logged into whatsapp today and the commentary said 'last seen yesterday at 20.26'. So now i'm thinking - should I just send her a cheeky message. is she checking whatsapp to see if i've got in touch? is it better for me to give her a little more space?

and all the while i'm trying, so much trying, to get back in a great place with God. where He is all I need. but that seems so far away. and I also need to get back with God because I want back with Him, not just because I want back with Eliza.

at least i'm capitalising His name again, i know that's important to God....